“Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. Sometimes it hurts, it even breaks your heart. But that’s okay. The journey changes you; it should change you. It leaves marks on your memory, on your consciousness, on your heart, and on your body. You take something with you. Hopefully, you leave something good behind.”
– Anthony Bourdain, 1956 – 2018
Last Friday was a mixed bag that only got shitter with the news of Anthony’s passing. I don’t know if I should be surprised or not at the impact of his abrupt absence. Parts Unknown was a bright spot in my week, eventually, he became a good friend of the family. He was the Uncle that’s never home for the holidays but sends neat stuff and questionable recipes.
Tony’s energy, his nonchalant poetry, gifted storytelling, dry humour, love for people and hunger for both the next meal and adventure… revived a dormant creature within me, the wild thing who knew I was responsible, I’m to be held accountable for my own wanderings that I must set out.
He was hurting at the hands of his demons, whatever they were and I’m sorry that he felt ending his life was the only choice, more so that I could possibly explain. Was it selfish? You can say that but there are a lot of things, aspects of the man, that will always remain a mystery. And who are we to judge?
Most of all? I regret he won’t get to experience another rainfall, to breathe in another lungful of fresh spring air or to taste a new exotic dish, that he didn’t get to meet new folks and immerse himself headfirst into yet another unknown to map and learn and to share with the rest of the world.
I give my deepest sympathy for his family, friends – most especially Eric Ripert-, and colleagues at CNN … and to the rest of us who he’s touched, however briefly. The world may be poorer without him but he’d given us himself in return, and what a gift that is.
Did you guys have a favourite episode of Parts Unknown, do you remember your first one? What interview or meal intrigued you? A favourite quote?
I know it’s not easy to confide in another person, however close they are to you and perhaps it’s because they are, it’s crucial we make an honest-to-goodness attempt to give ourselves a chance to move past our own demons, to live a happy life, whatever that looks like to you. In the darkest times, we lack perspective, to see how much we can matter to another human being. I know.
So please. Do the bravest thing you might ever have to do. Ask for help. Here’s a link to some excellent resources a good friend of mine sent to me.
HELPGUIDE.ORG | Are you feeling suicidal?
I hope you safe and thriving.