… I think that is the most epic in this podcast (Welcome to Night Vale) ever, (and I must say Kevin pulled it of damn well) with the NV music swelling to a high and Kevin and Lauren we frozen in their Strex-made underwears. With fear. Of the man holding the cat (an Erika the *whispers* angel).
Okay … how shall I tell this one?
I was awaiting June the 1st with unhealthy anticipation. It was Sunday so I had chores to get done. I was about to collapse in a hot heap when I remembered why I was supposed to be so stoked! In this heat, shirts were for losers so I ditched mine and locked myself up in my room and sprawled on my bed, cradling my phone.
What the hell. Let me just say that I had lost my marbles temporarily. It was good that I was alone but I think my family heard me because the gave me those knowing looks of concern.
So here’s a section of the transcript for this episode:48, Renovations. (The following are parts from the transcript I found at Cecil Speaks). It’s kind of long, but it would be cool it you read it through 🙂
[Gasps] What was that?
Listeners, the lights just went out in the studio.
Kevin? Why has Daniel not come back from taking pictures of the cats? That should not have taken this long. He’s very efficient.
Shhhh! There’s someone here, Lauren! There’s someone else in this room!
Listeners, there is a bright, black glowing coming from the middle of our studio. It is glowing around the shape of someone neither man nor woman, tall, long, with great black wings, beating softly through filtered and recirculated 71º air. It is holding something. Something small and round. Listeners, it is holding a light bulb!
It’s moving now. The person– the…the what? The…the angel (angels are, of course, real and very dangerous). This dangerous being is walking to the wall, to that new piece of art. The art that, unlike any other art in history, is not depicting teeth.
Oh, Smiling God! That picture! Kevin, that picture, it’s– It’s different now.
The lighthouse? Moments ago, the picture was of a lighthouse on a desert mountain in the clean light of midday. Now the photo is a lighthouse at desert’s dusk! Purple-orange sky and a blinking red light atop the mountain. The light in the photo is actually blinking!
There is a door at the foot of the stone tower, and that door is opening. A deep, purple glow slowly silhouetting a man – it looks like a man. I cannot tell if he is tall or if he is short. He is holding something. I cannot tell what it is, but it moves in his arms.
[A faint but familiar note starts welling in the background]
The man is– he is entering the lighthouse! He–
Kevin, the door! Our studio door.
Daniel! Is that you? Are the kittens dealt with?
I see only the intruder’s shadow, in that deep purple glow. It is– it is the man from the lighthouse! He is holding something!
[A familiar drum beat begins to play]
The dangerous, dangerous angel is with him! The man is holding something!
No! How did you–
He is holding–
Don’t come any nearer!
He is holding a cat.
[Welcome to Night Vale theme plays, with a bit of extra bass]
or possibly like
Cecil: Thank you for bringing me here, Erika.
And while whatever happens next, happens, I take you, Night Vale, to the weather!
OH SWEET MERCIFUL FROWNING GOD!
CECIL IS BACK AND YOUR STREX ASSES ARE ABOUT TO BE BBQ-ED. DANA, OLD WOMAN JOSIE, MAYOR PAMELA WINCHELL, MAUREEN, JOHN PETERS – YOU KNOW, THE FARMER -, THE ANGELS, ALL WORKING TOGETHER TO RECLAIM NIGHT VALE AS OUR OWN. STREX CORP WITH ALL OF YOUR MONEY AND YELLOW HELICOPTERS, WHAT YA GONNA DO ABOUT IT?
Let me just say that the weather was so damn fitting.
Also Kevin, The Whispering Forest and I have a thing in common: we strongly dislike Lauren.
At the almost end Cecil says:
There was one escape attempt during the unending, deadly horror that was the staff softball game. Ugh! Mmm. But…there were helicopters everywhere, and we were captured trying to dig a tunnel under second base with staple pullers.
But, last night, just when – as all picnic-goers eventually do – we had given up all hope of someday being free, former intern Dana appeared to me. There was an old oak door, which I swear had not been in the heavily-electrified volleyball nets before – or, no. No. No more euphemisms. No more talking around it. They were high voltage electric fences, fatal to any who touched them.
Cecil lives for metaphors, he breaths it in almost every sentence so when you hear him saying this you know shit’s getting real.
Renovations ends with this:
Listeners, so much is wrong. Here is what’s right:
Night Vale Community Radio is ours again. We are the only thing in Night Vale not owned by Strex and I swear…I swear…we will stay that way.
And soon this whole town will be as this station is now. Not without struggle, not without loss. Not without grave injury and a lifetime of what-ifs. But we will do it.
We may be controlled by the City Council, and the Vague, Yet Menacing, Government Agency, and chemtrails, and the Secret Order of Reptile Kings, and the mysterious lights that hover above us, but we will not be controlled by a Smiling God! We are Night Vale! And we are, in our own way, free!
We must continue to fight, and resist. We must be the heroes we look for in others. We must no longer speak in code, but in action.
Return to your homes, if you can. But do not lock your doors tonight. Do not hide yourselves away from danger. Be brave. Be truly brave.
I mean, don’t get carried away. Stay out of the Dog Park. And don’t run with knives. And, for crying out loud, don’t cry out loud. You’ll upset the bears, which are emotionally fragile animals that are already very uncomfortable with themselves.
When I heard Lauren said Daniel was taking pictures of the kittens, I can almost swear I never grinned such an evil grin of delight before. Those fu*kers didn’t even know. I laughed and laughed and laughed. Oh, man. I sounded like one of those hyenas from the Lion King.
The Whispering Forest showers the passerby with compliments to lure them into joining them, in becoming one with the forest, forever. It also issues insults too, like it did to Kevin when he cam up close (they don’t want you). But when they ignore Lauren. Damn, you know you’re beyond messed up when they snub you. But we’re not surprised, it’s Lauren after all.
Here are some depicted reactions of the Night Vale fandom:
We don’t know where Carlos is but I hop he is safe. We must remember though, this is just the beginning.
That is all (technically). Until the next episode, on the 15th, I shall go and hide. Thank you for reading all of this, my heart is just set on fictional worlds and their perils.
P.S: My lovely followers, I’ve been busy of late and I hope to be posting and visiting more often soon!