What makes the world go round?

Ten minutes ago, I didn’t see myself writing this. Curious enough to take a peak?

The Excellence Asylum

A good morning or a peaceful good night to all you lovely people! Here’s a thought I’d like to share, feel free to criticize or to expand.

***

Science is irrelevant here now. Leave it alone. So what makes the world go round? Life and the sheer wonder of its existence. The steps of feet beating on the ground, bare feet on the trodden earth and the rapid fire heartbeats traveling on the unworn path. The towering humble tree, down to the smallest plant, whose roots anchor the soil. It’s the simultaneous breaths and infinite pauses slamming into each other.

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41 thoughts on “What makes the world go round?

  1. I understand the feeling of not getting any feedback after writing something as fantastic as this post, full of words that make a good poem. I will see if I can transform it into one. It’s Thanksgiving Day here in Canada, so I have plenty of time today.

    1. I’m speechless as to think anyone would find my writing fantastic, thank you! As for not getting feedback, I’ve become content with the likes I have been receiving as they gave me some sort of indication of how well my post has turned out to be. Comments, I never had enough of them! I’m not sure as to what’s the custom if I should say “happy Thanksgiving” or not but I do hope you are having a pleasant day.

      1. “Happy Thanksgiving” is never a bad thing. Who doesn’t want to be happy after all? Well, I may take the time to go through your blog later if you want more of my comments. I actually give way more comments than likes. This particular piece of yours is not too bad, almost poetry ready. It took me about 3 hours to organize it into a poem. I actually forgot that it was a holiday this morning and went to work. Could have planned something. Are you from Guyana? It’s my first time seeing visitors from there. I can like your post at the other blog though.

      2. You’re certainly welcome to look around when you can. Three hours? That would explain how well it’s written. My lump of a paragraph came right out of the blue and directly posted without any refinement as I was particularly lazy just then. I’m guessing it must have been a nice surprise to find you have the day off!
        Yes, I’m from Guyana and from what I gather not many here are really into blogging, well, according to what I’ve heard. Oh, you could but you don’t have to unless you want to.

      3. I was responding to your other poem “Grains of time”. I hope you didn’t wait too long. We are actually in the same time zone. I previously thought that you’d be in the U.K., which is at midnight now. Poetry takes time. Everything takes time. Quality matters. Don’t you think it’s worth it if you want to publish one day? It’s pretty easy to waste 3 hours away with a computer game just like that. At least I was writing a poem.

      4. Not really, you take your time to say what you have to. Poetry definitely takes time, the quality depends on how much up put into it. I know how horribly easy hours can be blown off while gaming. Out of curiosity, why did you think I was from the UK?

    2. You seem to be in the close circle of Chatty Owl. That’s why. I’m off to go for tonight now. I may take another look before I go to bed at midnight, which is 4 hours from now. Have a good evening there.

      1. Okay, I’m back. It’s Thanksgiving here in Canada. Most stores are closed. Nowhere to go anyway. Chatty Owl is in the U.K.. I’m old though, 36 now. Are you still in your high school?

      2. I moved to Canada with my parents at 15 though. That’s a tremendous advantage. I was also late with my grade school, just to learn French and English on top of my mother tongue, Chinese. If you have the environment, it’s a lot easier.

  2. I posted at my blog to secure ownership first (http://simplyjet.wordpress.com/2013/10/14/what-makes-the-world-go-round/). However, the words are taken from your work for sure, whose credits I must give. You see, a poem and a short essay are the same essentially, except that a poem gives you that poetic feel along with the content to make it more obvious for readers. I hope you enjoy its transform to poetry.

    What Makes The World Go Round?

    A brilliant spark of life to be,
    A morning wonderful,
    Creates a heart of fire that beats
    To evenings beautiful.

    The steps of feet that travel through
    Along the path unworn,
    Not far beyond the mountains blue
    I see a world unborn.

    A little plant, a humble tree,
    Whose roots in soil extend,
    My rapid breaths, my pauses brief,
    In forest deep they blend.

    The tales to tell by word by hand
    Of wars and peace entwined,
    A sense serene in me commands,
    Which morphs with me in line.

    The sound of laughs, the feel of hugs,
    The stories old that pierce
    Come from a heart of glass uncut,
    Sand forged with thunder fierce.

    A touch of balm, a sigh of calm,
    Is like a smile, a wink,
    Like flakes of snow to melt in palms,
    My delicacy inked.

    It’s birds that chirp, with beasts that sound,
    A raging river rush
    Of nature’s song where peace abounds
    In harmony as such.

    And so what makes the world go round?
    It’s conflicts, fights and strives.
    And yet what makes the earth go round?
    It’s passion, love and life.

    1. That’s why I mostly prefer the poem to short essay, you would tell a lot more with less words, words that would only prove to clutter and dilute the appeal of the piece. Never mind that you used some of the words, you made them your own in this lovely poem! I enjoyed especially the stanzas:
      “The steps of feet that travel through
      Along the path unworn,
      Not far beyond the mountains blue
      I see a world unborn.

      A little plant, a humble tree,
      Whose roots in soil extend,
      My rapid breaths, my pauses brief,
      In forest deep they blend …”
      -and-
      “It’s birds that chirp, with beasts that sound,
      A raging river rush
      Of nature’s song where peace abounds
      In harmony as such.

      And so what makes the world go round?
      It’s conflicts, fights and strives.
      And yet what makes the earth go round?
      It’s passion, love and life.”

      I never expected anyone to take on to write something in response. Thanks again.

      1. It’s an iambic tetrameter followed by an iambic trimeter, one to open and the other to close, one of the easiest format. You can just keep on repeating the same structure to the end, with however many stanzas you want.

        In my opinion, these two stanzas match your words the best.

        The tales to tell by word by hand
        Of wars and peace entwined,
        A sense serene in me commands,
        Which morphs with me in line.

        The sound of laughs, the feel of hugs,
        The stories old that pierce
        Come from a heart of glass uncut,
        Sand forged with thunder fierce.

        Compare them with the following, which you wrote:

        “The telling of tales on paper or by word. Imagination. Innovation. Chaos with a morphing sense of serenity. T’is the sound of laughter, the feel of a hug. The glint of a sincere smile from a heart of glass, sand forged with thunder.”

        I hope I understood you correctly there, especially when you had said, “a morphing sense of serenity.” If I am wrong, please let me know.

      2. For the longest while I’ve been writing in free verse, I’m now experimenting with a few structured formats like nonet and haiku. I think I’ll have a go at the ones you’ve used soon. No worries, you got it right 🙂 I really like the parallel (is that the correct term?) your poem created with my essay, I’d like to reblog it to this blog if you don’t mind.

      3. Oops, I pasted 3 poetry links in the previous reply, which awaits your approval now. WordPress doesn’t like spams, so your default setting rejects all responses with more than 2 links in them.

      4. They won’t take you more than an hour to go over. It’s very easy stuffs. However, it’s a good idea to keep them around for quick reference, like a list of namespaces and base classes for programming or something like that.

  3. I was told to change “like flakes” to “a flake”, making it sound like somebody falling too deep in love at that moment. You can also add computer graphics to it to make it look like Final Fantasy, which should take you 2 weeks of 16 hours per day to get it done for perfection.

    I prefer the original feel and sense of tranquility though.

    1. You know what, twdyen? I think your a troll because I’m bewildered at the inconsistent comments, especially about Canada, where the hell those came from, I have not a clue and it’s becoming irksome real fast. I welcome constructive thoughts here but frankly I don’t see what else there is to be said on this post.
      When I say I appreciated comments, I’d prefer they have a point. Technically you are spamming this post and if you can’t explain what you’re up to I will have to ignore you or will even block you because you’re coming off as a creep. Also, I would like it very much to know how you found out me being Guyanese.

      1. I agree with you that there’s nothing else to be said about this post. What was the question you wanted to ask yesterday? If you have forgotten it, then that’s that. I’m sorry about not waiting for a while yesterday.

      2. Sorry that I didn’t notice this earlier. What did I say about Canada that was inconsistent? I checked them again and realized that I had said little about Canada in the first place. And your nationality? You confirmed my suspicion when I asked you the question based on the first visitor from Guyana at my blog. I never had visitors to my blog from Guyana before.

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