When life gets rough, when the morning sunlight feels as if it burns my skin and my brain tricks me into thinking that I’ve become a vampire, when time seems to be non existent and especially those times when I stop believing in myself, contemplating my worthlessness to my family, myself and the world – I need to pause. I need hot chocolate. I need Steve and Jon.
It’s then when I have to clear my mind and try to reach down and find that place inside me, my inner peace, that’s been shoved deeper and deeper down until I can’t feel it anymore and I become more vulnerable to the constant stream of slithering and heavy chaos.
I need to remind myself of the things I live for, the things and people that are worth living for. To remember that there are more good than evil, that there will be another good day. I have a lot to give, I want to affect people, to make someone’s life better, I want to be the cause of someone’s smile. I want to make my life count for something. Up to now this post might have led you to believe I’m depressed, I am often but right now I’m stressed and mad at myself. The best thing for me is to listen to music, The Piano Guys do it for me.
My progress on the reviewing challenge is coming along steadily, 52 books is going to be a lot for me this year but I need this challenge, to get me going and keep me occupied but obviously I have to have priorities, reading and reviewing isn’t at the top of the list this year though.Recently, I’ve taken up more responsibilities and I have to work on my procrastination and I am. Challenges, big ones, little ones, skinny ones too 😛 It’s a think positive, feel positive, be positive thing. We all need to surround ourselves with positive people, life’s sweeter that way.
Random line: Normally I work out every other day, to let my muscles heal themselves but now I’ve built a resistance so now I’m faced with the decision to go every day when and if i have time, at this moment I have almost half an hour. Will I get my butt off and get going? You bet 😉